Saturday, 12 April 2008

The Grand Re-Opening Of Dannii's Box!

The time has come to gently brush the cobwebs off Dannii's Dirty Box and resume our worship of pop music's most fabulous diva! I've only been away for a little over a month but there has been no shortage of stunning developments. Dannii began April by making a spectacle of herself in America (read more here) before bravely signing on for Olivia Newton-John's charity walk along the Great Wall Of China. After returning from her Chinese odyssey Dannii will resume hosting duties for "Australia's Got Talent" and promote the local release of her fabulous "Club Disco" album (affectionately known as "Club Dildo"). The highlight of Dannii's unprecedented barrage of promotion promises to be her performance of "Xanadu" on the finale of "It Takes Two" scheduled for the 22nd of April. Expect a wave of discomania to engulf the nation! In the meantime, please check out DDB's first video extravaganza featuring exclusive, never before seen footage of Dannii in China! Many thanks to Magical Froggy for assembling this gem for me!

Before I get around to updating you all on Dannii's latest antics, I'd like to announce a major change to the blog. Namely, I've invited four new members to join Dannii's Dirty Box! I was finding it difficult to maintain two blogs (in addition to working full time and trawling the streets of Sydney for cheap thrills), so I called on some friends to share the workload. If you've been part of Dannii's online community for any length of time, chances are you'll already know my new co-authors. I'm not about to let any old riff raff inside the hallowed walls of Dannii's Box, so please rest assured that these connoisseurs know their stuff. I've included a short bio and an interview with each member. Please make them welcome!

Tommie

Dannii's biggest, and possibly only, Swedish fan. Loves vodka, sailors and the queen of Swedish pop (the legendary Bionda). Dreams of one day oiling Dannii's buns in Ibiza. The only new member not currently banned from the Dannii Board but give him time.

1. When did you become a Dannii fan?
Circa 2002 when "Put The Needle On It" leaked. I was dead-sure it was to be her first ever number one! No, seriously. But at least she charted higher than Kylie's massive flop single "Come Into My World".

2. Your favourite Dannii song?
Tough one! I'd have to say "I Begin To Wonder" to be honest. Everything was so right with that release - Dannii was robbed! I do love songs like "Attitude" for all the wrong reasons though.

3. Your favourite Dannii album?
Just her studio albums? "Neon Nights". But I probably listen to "The Hits & Beyond" more! SO. MANY. NUMBER. ONES.

4. Dannii's defining moment?
When the DWTS host in Australia mentioned all her massive number ones, of course! Take that Kylie! Lezziigate and flashing her tits in Playboy come a close second.

5. What do you love most about Dannii?
The grand delusion that comes with being a Dannii fan. The hopeless dreams as a fan that her next single is her first ever number one. The anticipation that Sony BMG will save Dannii's music career. The compulsive thoughts that the club charts do matter. And so on.


Magical Froggy

Representing the UK, Magical Froggy has worshipped the Queen of Clubs for more than a decade. Well known across the internet for his sublime and hilarious artwork, Magical Froggy (or Neptune as he is perhaps better known) is the man behind such legendary creations as the DanniiGoose and Where's Janet? as well as 95% of the artwork to feature on Dannii's Dirty Box.

1. When did you become a Dannii fan?
Although I used to watch Dannii in Home & Away (how could I forget her sunning herself on that lovely rock in the credits?!), and was aware of her early musical efforts, it wasn't until "Girl" that she truly caught my attention. I was entranced by this stunning blonde creature belting out "All I Wanna Do" on TOTP completely unaware that it was THE Dannii Minogue. I have been entranced by the more talented Minogue ever since...

2. Your favourite Dannii song?
"So Under Pressure" - the heartfelt lyrics about how Dannii felt following Kylie's cancer diagnosis are perfectly complemented in the video by bikinis and snakes.

3. Your favourite Dannii album?
"Girl" even the bad tracks are fascinating!

4. Dannii's defining moment?
Climbing out of a giant toilet on childrens' TV!

5. What you love most about Dannii?
Her determination to carry on, despite her bitch sister constantly trying to overshadow the true talent in the family.

Jay

Jay (also known as Queen Of Flops and Mr Grumpy) keeps the flame of Dannii fandom burning bright in Ireland. Renowned for his no nonsense demeanor and sharp tongue, this Dannii fan eats droids for breakfast. He was also famously accused of breaking into AATW's warehouse to steal an advance copy of "The Hits & Beyond". Jay's goal in life is to spend as much time as Dannii doing nothing.

1. When did you become a Dannii fan?
Though I knew of her due to her less $ucce$$ful sibling, it was the epic performance of "All I Wanna Do" in the ripped dress that cemented my Dannii Fandom.

2. Your favourite Dannii song?
"Don't Wanna Lose This Feeling", with "I Can't Sleep At Night" and the sublime "Am I Dreaming" close second and third.

3. Your favourite Dannii album?
"Girl" - though "The Hits & Beyond" is my favourite "Greatest Hits" album of all time.

4. Dannii's defining moment?
The classy spreads for Playboy.

5. What do you love most about Dannii?
Her dedication. To holidaying!

Natty

A long time Dannii fanatic from Melbourne, Natty fantasises about fisting Delta Goodrem and hopes to one day marry Grant Denyer. Natty has met Dannii several times and is well known and loved by anyone who has ever ventured onto a Minogue forum.

1. When did you become a Dannii fan?
I don't really remember, the first song I can remember clearly was "This is It", so I'm guessing the 15 years or so ago when that was released.

2. Your favourite Dannii song?
Nothing makes me moister than the gaytastic mardi gras anthem that is "Everlasting Night"!

3. Your favourite Dannii album?
Does "The Hits & Beyond" count? Actually I will go with "Neon Nights" because it's pure Dannii bliss.

4. Dannii's defining moment?
Being at Rod Laver Arena for the final Homecoming concert and watching Dannii upstage big sis Kylie while singing "Kids". I think I wet myself a little, seeing both girls on stage in Melbourne and being in the crowd to witness it.

5. What you love most about Dannii?
The music obviously, and she's such a hilarious and warm person in real life. It's just a shame that the record companies often seem to stuff her around so she seems like this lazy sod who can't be assed doing anything!

I'd like to thank everyone for their e-mails and comments encouraging me to start posting again. I really hope you will enjoy the new and hopefully improved Dannii's Dirty Box!

7 comments:

tommie said...

Hurray!

Jay said...

Fabulous! As the first person in the whole entire world to buy a copy of The Hits & Beyond (the CD + DVD version no less), I am honoured to be inside Dannii's box!

Miss Halliwell said...

FREE TIBET! lol i love it...

I demand the Dannii Quiz! I have been a fan for as long as Queen Lizzie has been on her throne! or something!

Welcome back inside Dannii's Dirty Box!

Natty said...

this is the closest I'm ever going to get to Dannii's Box so I should make the most of it. Now all I want is another one of those pink pussy shots in honour of this historic occasion!

Johnny said...

Fabulous news about The Dirty Box's reopening. Lets hope 2008 brings many more Dannii moments!

Maude said...

C'est la fĂȘte !!!!!!!
I just find it strange that anybody didn't mention the Hakuna Matata video where Dannii sings amongst starving children who just do not understant what's going on ;)

Trashtastic Aussie said...

I have to admit, I had thought of Hakuna Matata AFTER I was interviewed!